Divorce and Separation: How to End a Marriage with Intention and Integrity

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This 2-hour workshop will take you through the five key strategies for working with divorce and separation; an intentional healing process, and provides interventions in each stage of the process to help both couples and individuals going through a divorce, separation or moving on.  Relationship expert, Dr. Tammy Nelson, will give clear and effective treatment strategies to work with clients throughout the decision making process, all the way through to a healthier separation.  

Through power point, case studies, and empathetic and an entertaining and engaging lecture, Dr. Nelson will share her many years of expertise and introduce you to contemporary intervention strategies, to empower both you and your clients.

OUTLINE

Divorce as an Intentional Healing Process

• Therapy can help when clients want to end their marriage
• Is divorce always a treatment failure? 
• Partnerships that are intentional, legally and emotionally, and focused on integrity as the priority
• Help couples commit to ending their marriage with intention
• Avoid devastation of partner, legally, emotionally or financially
• Work on the trauma, grief and healing-inventing a new future without rewriting the past

Strategy One: Decision Making

• Help the individual and couple be clear that they want to end their marriage
• Pursue potential and alternative possibilities
• Help clients when they are ready to disengage and set rules of disengagement

Strategy Two: Intentional Communication

• Healthy and kind boundary to avoid triggers and disengage consciously, uncoupling step by step
• Set boundaries, communicate feelings, dialogue about children, create owners and avoid manipulation
• Identify problematic behaviors, true deal breakers, treatment failures, challenging couples and affairs
• Work with transparency and countertransference

Strategy Three: Intervention- Legal and Emotional

• Legal and psychological intervention, review of collaborative divorce
• Process versus mediation and cooperative divorce
• Create and define a parenting and family plan, visitation, support
• Diminish ongoing legal damage
• Continued family life and co-parenting communication

Strategy Four: Grief Work and Trauma

• Healing, recovering from betrayal, and trust issues
• Divorce vs. death of spouse, grieving together versus alone and survivor guilt
• Self-care versus family care
• Holistic recovery and stress management
• Therapy as container- teaching resilience and transparency 
• Empathy, moving on, remorse and ambivalence

Strategy Five: Creating a Vision of the Future

• A shared vision of a new future for the future- of a new type of relationship
• A support group, a system for support, Intentional Divorce groups, intensives or retreats
• Saying thank you, expressing gratitude, appreciation and moving on
• Create a ritual- Moving on to a shared ritual

OBJECTIVES

• Describe how divorce can be a transformational process and the five key strategies for working with intentional divorce therapy.
• Define how each partner colludes with the narrative leading to divorce, how to create a healthy dissolution, and how separation is not always a treatment failure but can contribute to a stable individual and family life.
• Explain how to heal shame and guide decision making, communication, intervention, work through grief, and create a new vision for the future.

ABOUT THE SPEAKER

Tammy Nelson, Ph.D., is a licensed psychotherapist in private practice, a relationship expert and international speaker, an author, a faculty member and teacher with a Doctorate in Philosophy in Clinical Sexology. She is a Board Certified Sexologist, a Diplomate of the American Board of Sexologists, a Licensed Professional Counselor, an AASECT Certified Sex Therapist, a Registered Art Therapist, a Licensed Alcohol and Drug Counselor, a Certified Imago Relationship therapist and an Advanced Imago Clinician. 

Dr. Tammy is the author of several books including, The New Monogamy; Redefining Your Relationship After Infidelity (2013), Getting the Sex You Want: Shed Your Inhibitions and Reach New Heights of Passion Together (2008) and What’s Eating You?: A Workbook for Anorexia and Bulimia (2004). She is the author of Six Weeks to Desire (2013) eBook, as well as several chapters of edited compilations and articles in professional journals. Dr. Nelson has been a featured expert in NY Times, Washington Post, Redbook, MSNBC, Shape, Men’s Health, Woman’s Day, Women’s Health, Self, Glamour Magazine, Cosmopolitan, and a source in Time magazine. She writes for HuffingtonPost, YourTango, and Psychotherapy Networker, as well as her own popular blog www.drtammynelson.com/blog/.

Tammy speaks internationally and gives workshops and Intensives for couples and trains therapists around the world on issues relating to sex and relationships. Her campaigns reach audiences in the hundreds of thousands, both for clinical and consumer audiences.  Her goal is to create global relational change through personal transformation. She can be found at www.drtammynelson.com.

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